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But But But...!

Posted on July 12, 2012 at 6:05 PM

The other day I was driving and I had one of those epiphanies that I often experience and then forget. This one stuck with me. It's about the word "but."

 

We all use it frequently. Yet, I do not believe that any of us stop to think of the implications of this word. For example, "I do love you, but..." or "I appreciate the work that you did, but..." When we use this word, it actually contradicts the positive aspects of the initial statement. In fact, it indicates that we are not being truthful. If indeed we were satisfied, we would not need the "but." Usually what comes after this word is hurtful and disappointing to us. The former part of the sentence builds us up and increases our spirit, and then it comes crashing down when the "but" shows up. In essence, it's like repeated mini heart breaks, and over time makes us doubt ourselves, our abilities, and our capabilities.

 

Use of this word "but" has become habit. We say it, without realizing how we feel when it is said to us. It's a word of limitation, of dishonesty, and of excuses. Of course there are instances where it does apply, but not nearly as often as it is spoken.

 

It is my belief, that we need to focus harder on the implications of the harmful things that we say. The words we speak manifest themselves into creation whether it is our intention or not. In order for us to live the most authentic lives possible, we need to choose our words wisely. Words have immeasurable power. They can lift one up to the heavens, while also plunging one into the depths of hell. They can create as well as destroy.

 

Now we have to consciously choose our words. We have to make it a point to THINK ABOUT WHAT WE SAY, WHAT WE MEAN, AND HOW WE SAY IT.

 

If you are not satisfied, say you are not satisfied. Do not leave the door open for even more dissatisfaction to occur by not being honest with yourself and others. But = Dissatisfaction. Try replacing the word "but" with the word "and." It is going to completely change the way you think about and say things. It will change the way you relate to others. It will change the way you feel about yourself. It feels good to speak from an authentic place instead of from a place of doubt and uncertainty. It's wonderful to release others from the same doubt and uncertainty! By using "and," we essentially force ourselves to rethink our opinions, our ideas, and our emotions. Are we speaking out of anger? Out of frustration? Out of sadness or desperation? What is it that we are truly trying to say, what is the real point? This one tiny little word causes so much confusion. It's time to eliminate it wherever and whenever we can.

 

 

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